In the early days of ministry, we had a male church staff but a few months after Kayla was born, he had to go to school so we needed another staff. A female staff was sent to take his place and how my heart did several double dives because I was excited right? Naa! All them stories I had heard about female staff came playing in HD before me ( ermmm not very nice stories). Thoughts like Aha, you are now in church ministry, shine your eyes, tighten your seat belt ( and start a never ending journey of loosing sleep and peace over unfounded issues.) Now my husband was not and is not one I had any reason to doubt his unflinching commitment to our marriage vows. He was God’s gift to me just the way I wanted as far as a high regard for our marriage vows were concerned but see how my faith in gory tales began to try and outweigh all of that. Thoughts are like birds, they are free to hover above your head but it’s up to you let them build a dynasty there or you shoo them away at their first flutter around you.
Sister came and that’s how I will look at her with corner eye. Little did I know God sent me an Angel in human form for this journey of mine. Well, I shooed those thoughts away gradually though because it was the front porch of my heart that I initially opened up to her. Sister Peace was what I call a circumstantial introvert. She never said much in those early days but would quietly take charge of Kayla so I could be a part of the service. Some days Kayla would be strapped to her back while she attended to her job. Dirty dishes in my sink as far as Peace was concerned meant she had to wash them when she came to the house. Quietly she would go straight there and wash even when I didn’t ask. By the way, I didn’t know how to ask for help so I did things myself even when all of me screamed out for a break. She seemed to sense that and would just render the help she figured I needed.
As I opened the living room doors of my heart, she opened up some more. That’s why I said she was a circumstantial introvert because today myself and Peace can gist for Africa. She became the first of the support system God was raising for me.
Dear Pastors wife , don’t trample underfoot what God intended to be the answer to the prayer for help that you stormed heaven with. Don’t walk in assumptions, superstitions, unfounded suspicions or old wives tales, rather yield to the leading of the Spirit and you will not be embracing that which should be kept at bay and keeping at bay that which was sent as an answer. Many homes have been torn apart by one baseless suspicion. To investigate and scrutinize every female that crosses your path takes away your personal peace and makes you miss out on relationships that would have otherwise been beautiful and productive. Oh by all means have sane boundaries. I had them and still have them. My husband’s meals were and are still made by me. Our bedroom was and is still cleaned by me. When Pastor was home, there was no such thing as Pastor sir I brought you lunch or serve Pastor Sir in the house. Sister Peace was still fresh out of her teenage years at the time but she had such ancient wisdom. She seemed to know from the onset where the lines were. She was a mighty blessing without being intrusive.
During the annual conferences and programmes we have as a ministry how I spent most of my sessions was chasing about the active toddler that Kayla was becoming. I would yearn for my single days when I would sit undistracted in meetings and programmes. Peace would snatch out some free time from her official responsibilities to help out with Kayla so I could catch my breathe and be a part of the programme like the Christian I was. Sister Peace became my life line. Over the years, she became as an adopted daughter. She came into our lives when Kayla was months old. It’s these many years later and she’s still such a blessing.
Her staff responsibilities grew and she moved on to a bigger assignment but our connection has grown beyond her staff duties. It’s 10 years later and we can say she was handpicked by God as one of the earliest support systems we would be needing. Don’t miss the tribe God begins to build for you on this journey as a Shepherd’s helpmeet because trust me, you really need one.